This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
