As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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