I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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