so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
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last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
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We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
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