I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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