"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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