well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
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Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
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WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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