are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
