BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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