and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
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apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
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I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
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