That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
