She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
