you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
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just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
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Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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