Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize