i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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