Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
