if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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