is your mom at the bar?
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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