My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
