thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
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he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
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