she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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