Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize