I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
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