i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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