Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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