the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
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