Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I see more hoeing in ur future
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