Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Randomize
