i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
