based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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