I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
