you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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