Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Boobs speak an international language.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
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