She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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