You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
