I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
