i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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