So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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