Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
