too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
