it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Shame is for Republicans.
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