Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Still dying that you shit outside
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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