Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
