Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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