Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
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no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
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You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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