Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
