Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
