What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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