I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I think people are normalizing furries
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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