i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
