You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
